Crafting Your Essay for the Thomas A. Egan, S.J. Scholarship

Brainstorming Across the Four Buckets

To create a well-rounded essay, gather material from the following four buckets:

• Background: Reflect on your life experiences that shaped your values and aspirations. Consider family influences, community involvement, or pivotal moments that have guided your academic and personal journey.
• Achievements: Identify key accomplishments that demonstrate your leadership, responsibility, and impact. Use specific metrics or examples, such as projects you led, volunteer work, or academic honors.
• The Gap: Acknowledge any gaps in your education or experiences that further study will address. Explain why the scholarship is crucial for bridging these gaps and how it aligns with your future goals.
• Personality: Infuse your essay with personal anecdotes that reveal your character, values, and motivations. This humanizing detail will help the committee connect with you beyond your achievements.

Outline Your Essay Structure

Organize your thoughts into a clear outline. Each section should have a distinct purpose:

1. Introduction: Start with a concrete moment or scene that captures the reader’s attention. This could be a significant life event or a challenge you faced.
2. Body Paragraphs: Dedicate each paragraph to one of the four buckets. Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence, supporting details, and a reflection on why this information matters.
3. Conclusion: Reiterate your commitment to your goals and how the scholarship will help you achieve them. Reflect on your journey and emphasize your readiness to contribute to the Loyola community.

Drafting Voice and Style

Use an active voice throughout your essay to create a sense of immediacy and engagement. Avoid clichés and vague expressions of passion. Instead, provide specific examples and reflections that demonstrate your commitment and readiness for the challenges ahead. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea and transition logically to the next.

Revision & “So What?”

After drafting, take a step back and evaluate your essay. Ask yourself: “So what?” for each section. What insights or reflections have you provided? Ensure that your essay not only tells your story but also highlights the significance of your experiences and aspirations. Seek feedback from peers or mentors to refine your message and clarity.

Common Pitfalls to Avoid

Be mindful of the following mistakes:

• Avoid generic openings; instead, start with a specific moment that illustrates your journey.
• Steer clear of vague language and superlatives. Provide concrete examples and measurable outcomes.
• Do not invent facts or embellish experiences; authenticity is key to making a genuine connection with the committee.