Gertrude M Leo T Murphy Scholarship Essay Guide

Brainstorming Across the Four Buckets

Organize your thoughts into four key material buckets: Background, Achievements, The Gap, and Personality.

• Background: Reflect on your life experiences that have shaped your educational and career aspirations. Consider family influences, cultural background, or significant events.
• Achievements: List your academic and extracurricular accomplishments. Focus on metrics, responsibilities, and outcomes that demonstrate your impact and leadership.
• The Gap: Identify what you currently lack in terms of skills or knowledge and how the scholarship will help you bridge that gap. Be specific about how further study at Loyola will support your goals.
• Personality: Think about what makes you unique. Include personal anecdotes that reveal your values, interests, and motivations, giving the committee a sense of who you are beyond your achievements.

Outline Your Essay

With your material organized, create a structured outline. Start with an engaging opening that draws the reader in—consider starting with a specific moment or experience. Follow this with sections that flow logically, addressing each of the four buckets you’ve brainstormed. Ensure each paragraph has a clear focus and contributes to the overall narrative.

Drafting Voice and Style

When drafting your essay, use an active voice and specific language. Avoid clichés and vague statements; instead, focus on concrete details and reflections. Each paragraph should have one main idea, with transitions that guide the reader through your narrative. Reflect on your experiences and articulate what you learned, answering the “So what?” question throughout your essay.

Revision and “So What?”

After drafting, take a break before revising. This distance will help you view your work with fresh eyes. Look for clarity and coherence, ensuring each section connects back to the scholarship's goals. Ask yourself if your essay effectively communicates your motivations and aspirations. Seek feedback from trusted peers or mentors, and be open to constructive criticism.

Common Pitfalls to Avoid

As you finalize your essay, be mindful of common pitfalls:

• Avoid opening with generic statements or clichés that do not add value.
• Steer clear of vague or unsupported claims about your passion or goals.
• Ensure your essay is free from passive constructions where an active subject exists.
• Do not invent experiences or embellish achievements; authenticity is crucial.