How to Craft Your Essay for the Class of 1954 Scholarship

Brainstorming Across the Four Buckets

To create a well-rounded essay, explore the four material buckets: background, achievements, the gap, and personality.

• Background: Consider your personal history and experiences that have shaped your educational journey. What events or influences have motivated you to pursue higher education?
• Achievements: Identify key accomplishments that demonstrate your skills and commitment. Include metrics or outcomes that quantify your contributions, such as leadership roles, projects, or community service.
• The Gap: Reflect on what you lack in your current situation and how further study at UMass Amherst will help you bridge that gap. Be specific about the skills or knowledge you wish to gain.
• Personality: Infuse your essay with humanizing details that showcase your values and individuality. This might include anecdotes or reflections that reveal who you are beyond your academic profile.

Creating an Outline

Organize your thoughts into a coherent structure. A suggested outline might include:

1. Introduction: Start with a compelling moment or story that draws the reader in.
2. Background: Discuss your formative experiences and how they relate to your educational aspirations.
3. Achievements: Highlight your key accomplishments and their impact.
4. The Gap: Explain what you hope to achieve at UMass Amherst and why it matters.
5. Personality: Share personal insights or values that reflect your character.
6. Conclusion: Reinforce your commitment to making a positive impact through your education.

Drafting Voice and Style

As you draft your essay, maintain an active voice that emphasizes your role in your achievements and aspirations. Avoid abstract language and focus on concrete details. When discussing your experiences, ensure you reflect on what you learned and why it matters—answer the “So what?” question throughout your essay.

Revision and “So What?”

After drafting, take a step back and revise with fresh eyes. Look for clarity, coherence, and engagement. Each paragraph should contribute to your overall narrative and reinforce your commitment to your educational goals. Ensure that your reflections are meaningful and convey your motivation.

Common Pitfalls to Avoid

Be aware of common mistakes that can weaken your essay:

• Avoid clichés and generic statements. Be specific about your experiences and insights.
• Do not rely on vague expressions of passion without evidence. Show your commitment through concrete examples.
• Steer clear of passive voice. Use active constructions to convey your agency and involvement.
• Do not invent facts or embellish your achievements. Authenticity is key to building trust with the committee.